Quote Of The Day

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...  Lust
Is perjured, murderous, bloody, full of blame,
Savage, extreme, rude, cruel, not to trust,
Enjoy'd no sooner but despised straight,
Past reason hunted, and no sooner had
Past reason hated, as a swallow'd bait
On purpose laid to make the taker mad. ~ W. Shakespeare

Grrrsday

He Who Fights And Runs Away

Leaves his owners with a $200 vet bill.

Somebody Up There Is Testing Me

The Health Department will have a booth at the Cultural Fest this weekend, and I am scheduled to do a presentation on Emergency Preparedness at 2:30.

Right after the local police department gives a presentation on the theory and practice of traffic stops.  To an audience that will be 75% African American.

I’m sensing a trend, here.

I Know The Feeling

On the plus side, I now have lovely matching left and right hand splints.

Well, That Explains Everything

Me:  What did you do to your forehead?

He:  I was picking up a lawnmower.

Me:  Of course.

He:  It was a riding mower.

20-Year-Olds are Easy

Due to a humiliating and entirely preventable incident with a household fixture last night, when I walk through the interns’ room this morning my left hand is enclosed in a splint and a sling.

Intern #1:  Wow…what happened to your hand?

Me:  You know that lesbian bar on Main Street, the one about half a block north of the old courthouse?

Intern #1 (her eyes getting big and round):  Yes….

Me:  Well, it had nothing to do with it.

There is a brief pause while this sinks in.  Sean* cracks up.

Intern #1:  You are so mean.

Caturday!

Quote of the Day

Photo:  Jim Purbrick via Flickr

A child educated only at school is an uneducated child. ~ George Santayana

But You Can't Choose Your Relatives

We spent the holiday weekend at my older sister's rather imposing residence, in company with other family members including my niece Elizabeth*.  It's common knowledge that her husband has been a little… wary… of the spousal unit ever since he had The Talk with Patrick* at their wedding.

Oldest sister:  Where's Patrick*?

Elizabeth*:  He's taking a nap.

Youngest sister (teasingly):  We should have Brian go wake him up, wearing his mean face.

Me:  How is his mean face any different from his every day face?

(“If you ever make her cry, I will track you down and kill you like a dog,” which is what he says to every young man reckless enough to marry into our families).

Happy 4th of July

We are visitin’ kin this weekend.  See you Monday.

Quote of the Day

When the Know-Nothings get control, it [the Declaration] will read “All men are created equal – except Negroes, foreigners and Catholics.”  When it comes to this, I should prefer emigrating to some country where they make no pretense of loving liberty – to Russia , for instance – where despotism can be taken pure without the alloy of hypocrisy. ~ A. Lincoln.

Grrrsday