Thursday, February 21, 2008

Cave Canem

I was standing at the ironing board the other day when I heard a ferocious barking from outside the window. That’s odd, I thought; one of Funnyface’s few redeeming qualities is that he’s a pretty quiet dog. Then I realized that a) it was not his bark, and b) it was coming from the side yard.

Two little rat dogs were bouncing up and down in the driveway, putting on a ferocious show against the German Shepherd (behind a chain link fence). I decided not to let them tempt Fate and went out to bring Funnyface in before anything happened. Just about the time I got to back yard, it dawned on both of us that not only was the winter supply of firewood stacked against the fence, but the spousal unit had removed enough logs from one end of it so that it now made a nice ramp to use as a launching pad onto the driveway.

Funnyface looked at the woodpile. He looked at the driveway. I swear I saw a light bulb go on above his head.

He beat me to the top of the pile but by virtue of a Nijinsky-like leap that I will never again in my life be able to duplicate, I got hold of one hind leg before he made it over. The logs began to slip under his paws and the two of us came crashing down to a triumphant chorus of yapping from the rat dogs.

Funnyface is not quite one year old; he was fine. I am fifty-two; I was not. Next day my boss saw me hobbling down the hall at work, favoring my left knee, which had ballooned up to the size of a cantaloupe.

She: “What did you to yourself this time?”

Me: “I was chasing the dog and fell off the woodpile.”

She: “I don’t think I want to hear any more.”

3 comments:

Not Important said...

And the little rat dogs get to go home and tell everyone how they defeated a big ol' muscle dog.

I always find that people are much less likely to believe the unvarnished truth about crazy injuries than they would be to believe a complete fabrication.

T-Mom said...

Ouch. My sympathies. Hope you heal up quick!

The thing that always steams me is that *if* something had happened, it would have been Funnyface the vicious GSD who would have been blamed, not the unsupervised and provoking toy dogs. Grrr.

Anonymous said...

Ha ha ha! I have seen the light bulb go on above my own dog's heads on occasion! I'm glad you caught him as I would have never have caught mine! To have a chance I have to be 3 steps ahead!
Hope the knee feels better!
Oh, and the Italians and I set a backside rule from the get go and I spent most of my time with the head coach (yummylicious) of the ladies team. I did score a couple kisses from the boys though! Ha ha! Thanks for leaving a comment, I love to hear from people who read the blog!